“People spend a lot of time looking at their phones while they’re supposed to be talking to each other or going out for dinner – I think that’s one of most unkind things you can do.”. Each facet of ours is a personality trait, makes us who we are and enhances the way we respond to things.. And kindness does play a pretty important role in that! Kindness matters more than we think. Kindness Keeps Us Healthy “Humans are a social species and have lived together in social groups for millions of years and, during that time, we’ve relied on each other to survive and thrive,” assures Dr Curry. Paul’s instruction to help us live for God each day is to imitate Christ’s kindness. When you do something nice for another person, they will naturally recall that act with fondness. “I believe that kindness is one of the most powerful tools we have.”. And something that seems kind to one person might be rather unkind to others.”. Memorial Day: More than the start of summer! Good employees don’t stay long in bad environments. “As soon as we’re tearing each other apart and going for the throat, no one ever changes their mind.”. “I’ve got back more than I’ve given,” she says, claiming that her kind acts lifted her on gloomy days and helped to quell her anxiety about the state of the world. Kindness reduces Ageing. “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” Maya Angelou, Molly Larkin is the co-author of the international best-seller “The Wind Is My Mother; The Life and Teachings of a Native American Shaman”  and other books on health. In a culture that so often appears to reward materialism and greed, practicing kindness and serving others as a family is a powerful way to pass on the values of empathy, thoughtfulness, and social responsibility. Get Free Access to The Morning Book; Daily Rituals for Daily Living by Molly and receive Ancient Wisdom Blog Posts, https://mollylarkin.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/12/Muskogee-Business-Chant-4-Times-Loop.mp3. “Something that might not seem kind now might be kind in the long run. Like mindfulness, kindness has become a popular trend in recent years. Russell had to think fast. Sometimes kindness is offering to get coffee, or bringing back a cookie from a lunchtime workshop just because. These bonds can lead to better relationships and lasting positive interpersonal results. Taught by spiritual teacher and best-selling author Molly Larkin, this creative, easy and user-friendly course is certain to get you started on a fulfilling meditation practice. The US psychological researcher Dr John Gottman claims that all successful relationships are underpinned by kindness – and that the most important time to be kind is during an argument. This is probably the hardest thing for a person to achieve. Kindness also reduces cortisol, the stress hormone, by 23%. Kindness is love in action. For beautiful eyes, look for the good in others; for beautiful lips, speak only words of kindness; and for poise, walk with the knowledge that you are never alone. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Greeting someone new in the neighborhood, office or church will make them feel welcomed and helps create a sense of community. Kindness can accelerate the healing process, 3. The greatest work that kindness does to others is that it makes them kind themselves. And the Original Peoples never took more than they needed. Kindness makes people’s lives better, but just encouraging individuals to be kinder to each other has significant limitations. “A warm smile is the universal language of kindness.” William Arthur Ward. Those were among the findings of a 2014 report by Dignity Health – a US healthcare company – and Stanford University Center for Compassion and Altruism Research and Education, which reviewed scientific literature about the role of kindness in healthcare. Aesop. “He told me the letter was a turning point,” says Russell, who penned The Little Book of Kindness: Everyday Actions to Change Your Life and the World Around You about her experiences. 47. Yes, animals will be killed for food, but first there is a prayer ceremony to ask the animal to be willing to give it’s life, and the emphasis is on teaching hunters to kill quickly, painlessly, with a first strike of a bullet or arrow. The study suggested that ‘kind’ hospitals didn’t just benefit patients: caregivers were also found to be more resilient. Try it now, during this half price introductory offer. Kindness is about showing empathy, acceptance and tolerance. And it is good for us. “I fear there is a lot of disconnection at the moment,” she says. Open the door for someone, give somebody a genuine compliment, or give some money to the homeless guy… It doesn’t matter what it is, as long as it helps … – Amelia Earhart. Dr Oliver Scott Curry’s research has found a causal link between helping and happiness. Kindness Matters. Kindness has many benefits including increased happiness and a healthy heart. Kindness DOES matter, and I am so thankful that I did not walk away from these situations. That’s why kindness is so hard to capture with just words. Thurston is an advocate of factoring kindness into everything we do, whether that’s looking at ourselves in the mirror – scanning for good points rather than bad – or interacting with others. It was a mission that had hitherto seen her slip £5 notes into books in Waterstones, give flowers to checkout assistants in Tesco and write letters to lonely pensioners. We believe that kindness has the power to change lives.’, But are we inherently kind? Each day, try to do something kind for another person. “I went to a phone box near to where I live, cleaned it up a bit and left a little pile of money inside with a note that read ‘please phone somebody you haven’t spoken to for a long time, and who you love’,” recalls Russell. Love in action is kind by … “The idea that some lives matter less is the root of all that is wrong with the world.” Paul Farmer. Various studies attribute altruism with releasing endorphins in the ‘reward’ part of our brains. It was 2011 and she was referring, among other things, to climate change and the London riots, which had recently happened on her doorstep and left her deeply saddened. It humanizes us; it lifts us spiritually. Why we shouldn’t celebrate Christopher Columbus! Kindness Is Supernatural When Paul laid out his case to the church in Corinth that he was a true apostle, he did so by detailing the trials he endured for the sake of the gospel, the inner spiritual life God granted him despite this suffering, and the God-produced spiritual fruit in his life (2 … We matter because kindness matters. Improves your immune system and health. We are all aware of the tragedy of the Syrian refugees trying to escape certain death in Syria and yet with nowhere to go. Robin Banerjee, professor of developmental psychology at the University of Sussex, agrees, but adds that kindness is “not black and white”. Kindness is a way love is expressed, a reason love multiplies, and an example of what is possible when love is prioritized. A lonely man rescues a puppy who … Evidence suggests that improved mood is a common side-effect of being kind. The reward area of the brain was found to be more active during acts of strategic kindness, but pure altruism also appeared to fire up our grey matter, suggesting that we get high on being kind. When you do something for another person, they will naturally recall that act with fondness. She is passionate about helping people live life to their fullest potential through her classes, healing practice and blog at www.MollyLarkin.com, Winter Solstice 2020: the time of luminous consciousness, Thank you for being! Kindness is also about telling the truth in a gentle way when doing so is helpful to the other person. I don’t think any feeling compares to the one experienced when seeing someone display kindness towards a stranger. A Thanksgiving Prayer, For Veteran’s Day, Let’s Follow the Native American Lead. Do one kind thing for someone else. It’s time to go back to the Original Instructions! “We found that helping does seem to have a causal effect on happiness,” says Dr Oliver Scott Curry, senior researcher at the Institute of Cognitive & Evolutionary Anthropology, who led the research. LISTEN TO A BLESSING CHANT FROM BEAR HEART, MEDITATIONS ON THE NATURAL WORLD - FULL COURSE. Pope Francis encouraged every single Catholic parish in Europe to “take in one migrant family.” This call to the region’s approximately 120,000 parishes would solve the problem with ease. Healthcare delivered with kindness can hasten healing and shorten hospital stays. Weeks earlier, Russell, an author, had pledged to do something altruistic every day for a year because she didn’t know what else to do in the face of “all these troubles”. Dr Gottman claims he can predict, with 90 per cent accuracy, whether a relationship will succeed or fail based on a couple’s ability to manage conflict. “I experience kindness daily because I lead life with a positive perspective.” When my friend told me this, she reminded me how easy it is to go about our days without thinking of the little acts of kindness, without taking the time to appreciate and recognize them. A recent study by the University of Sussex found that being kind, even when there seems to be nothing in it for us, activates the endorphin-releasing reward part of our brains. It could be by giving up our seat on a bus to someone who might need it more, or … “Something that one person sees as kind might not be seen as kind by someone else,” he notes. The review linked kinder care with better information sharing, which led to a range of outcomes, including reduced pain, anxiety and blood pressure. A raft of books, including Russell’s, have been published on the topic and various organisations – including Kindness UK, The Kindness Offensive and Compassion in Politics – now promote altruism in some form or another. According to the Random Acts of Kindness Foundation, you don’t even have to be the one doing or receiving an act of kindness to feel the positive effects. “You will not get people to accept your influence if you do not show kindness,” says Stoyanowski. “My religion is very simple. And those simple gestures of care really matter. We should never stop expressing kindness, because even in your darkest hour facing death, it will come back to you in ways you can't even imagine. Look strangers in the eye and give them a smile and a thank you. 7 reasons why kindness matters. We uncover the role of kindness in being human and how to bring more of it into the world. Those in the intervention group reported an increase in positive emotions, compared to those in the control group, which researchers linked to a boost in their ‘vagal tone’. Love that neglects to be kind is a false love. My religion is kindness.” Dalai Lama. According to Dr John and Julie Gottman – founders of the Gottman Institute, which studies relationships – all successful relationships are, ultimately, underpinned by kindness. Even more amazing was that this aired less than one week after the uproar over the killing of Cecil the lion in Zimbabwe. Why and what does all this mean? Remember, it doesn’t matter how small the gesture. Kindness Matters. You matter because you are worth every pain and every joy you have experienced. “It is in the shelter of each other that the people live.” – Irish proverb, “We should have respect for animals because it makes better human beings of us all.” Dr. Jane Goodall. A 2018 report by the Carnegie UK Trust reported what many of us sense: that kindness is lacking from our systems-based approach to public policy. I do not know you personally, but I promise that I do not need to in order to know how incredible, kind and smart you are. Copyright text 2018 by www.mollylarkin.com. The world would be different if you were not born. All rights reserved. And a few reasons why others should, The History of the U.S. Constitution We Weren’t Taught in School. “Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness….” Colossians 3:12. Lowers the rate of depression . Kindness on a basic level is quite easy; if you see someone in a favorable light you naturally want to be kind to them. “What does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness…” Micah 6:8. Would you recognize them again if you passed them on the street? One day our very lives may depend on it. Other studies link kindness with improved physical health. Altruism stimulates the reward area in our brains, 4. Why? That is a manifestation of kindness. I know that given a choice between doing business with a company with a friendly receptionist and a grumpy one, I will always choose the former. When there is an issue and your kindness is being tested, deal with it in a way that is firm but courteous. Why does kindness matter? Random acts of kindness promote good feelings among people and increase connections. Here are 50 reasons why: 50. Summer Solstice at Stonehenge: live streamed this year!! In 2013, researchers there placed volunteers into two groups: an intervention group, which promoted positivity through loving-kindness meditation, and an untreated control group. Mindless killing of animals just to pass the time? When you act kindly toward others, the benefits go both ways. But its benefits go … Basically, people who regularly perform RAOK not only live longer but their lives are less stressful. “I think it’s important to see kindness as a thread that runs through our whole life rather than little acts of kindness,” she says. These bonds can lead to better relationships and lasting positive interpersonal results. Image: Maud Fontein. But her hopes of an immediate date with the duvet were dashed when her partner asked a question: had she done her daily act of kindness? “I spent a lot of money in the first year, which wasn’t sustainable,” she says, claiming she threw “too many fivers around in Waterstones”. ‘It is based on the simple premise that people are good,’ goes the project’s strapline. Seriously? Your life does matter. For Russell, though, there was one unwelcome side-effect: kindness left her skint at first. Get Positive News stories in your inbox each week, This article has been created by Positive News and supported by Simple, 1. Oxytocin also increases our self-esteem and optimism, which is extra helpful when we’re anxious or shy in a social situation. We have the capacity to be kind and unkind, and there is also a question of perception. “I left some biscuits, too.”, She didn’t always witness the outcome of her deeds, but when she did, the impact could be profound. When people notice others being kind, they become inspired themselves to act that way. Increases the endogenous opioids in the brain, giving us a natural high. We feel happier when we act in service to others A recent study reported on how people felt after performing or observing kind acts every day for seven days. Meditations on the Natural World is designed to introduce you to a variety of meditation techniques, so you can choose what resonates with you. A bit of a minefield, then. Because that warm emotion of smiling would come across in their voices as they answered the phone, making the caller feel welcomed. One could happen to you, and you will be forever grateful to the person who offers you kindness and a friendly hand. Amelia Earhart. Tragedies happen every day. “Kindness is about showing empathy, acceptance and tolerance,” explains Lawrence Stoyanowski, a Vancouver-based therapist, who follows the principles set out by the Gottman Institute in his work. Random acts of kindness promote good feelings among people and increase connections. But still, Jaime Thurston – author of Kindness: The Little Thing That Matters Most, and the founder of 52 Lives – reckons that the kindest thing we can do for each other right now is to be present. What is the 7th Generation principle and why do you need to know about it? It’s cool to be kind, but is it a trend or a real tool for transforming society? Kindness process twice the amount of DHEA which slows down the act of aging. What’s more, the most important time to be kind they claim, is during conflict, such as an argument with a partner. Animals are sentient beings. ‘And lots of good people working together can achieve amazing things. She tries to be kind as a matter of routine – to herself, to others and to nature. The Gottman school of thought believes that kindness is not something you either have or don’t, but more like a muscle that needs to be exercised. The report, Kindness, Emotions and Human Relationships: The Blind Spot in Public Policy, finds that as technology transforms the way we do things, it is imperative that public policy focuses on emotional intelligence. 48. Kindness to self includes: On a personal level, everyone we meet is facing some kind of challenge we know nothing about. Indigenous peoples around the world understand that, teach that, and live their lives with animals as their teachers, companions and guides. A recent study by the University of Sussex found that being kind, even when there seems to be nothing in it for us, activates the endorphin-releasing reward part of our brains. When you are kind to someone, does it really matter? Be Kind to Others. Kindness is choosing to do something that helps others or yourself, motivated by genuine warm feelings. There is also 52 Lives, a charity that was set up to change someone’s life for the better every week of the year. Viewed from space, there are no borders separating countries on Earth. This, she now acknowledges, was also not what kindness was really about and has since thought more holistically about altruism, building it into her everyday life. Experts at Oxford University carried out a meta-analysis of such research last year and lent their support to the idea that altruism gives us a mental boost. This is also the hardest time to be kind. Makes you feel more creative. FACTORS THAT AFFECT CULTURES OF KINDNESS Providing the building blocks for community empowerment through positive relationships and values Reduce social isolation, tackling loneliness and improving well being WHY DOES KINDNESS MATTER? “How we treat each other determines the kind of community we live in, which determines the kind of country we live, which determines the kind of world we live in,” says Thurston. “It’s about being able to scan your partner for things to appreciate rather than criticise.”, Jaime Thurston: ‘It’s important to see kindness as a thread that runs through our whole life’, The Gottman school of thought posits that kindness shown during conflict leads to a de-escalation of tensions and a more satisfactory outcome for all parties. When we practice kindness, we change for the better -- and so does our world. Personally, when this type of encounter occurs, I find myself wanting to do the same. Psychologists analysed existing research relating to the brain scans of more than … Russell now regularly volunteers for the charity Trees for Cities, for example, planting saplings in her native city of London. Kindness is King. You have a unique role to play in the grand scheme of things. Researchers separated kindness into two forms: strategic, where someone expects something in return, and genuine, where they don’t. The irony is that, if each country would display an act of kindness, open its doors, and welcome just a few, the crisis would be solved. I guess it is as important as we are, as our every fibre is. When children are encouraged to be kind, their peers want to … It slows down the aging process and improves relationships and connections, which indirectly boosts your health. Causes employees to want to work harder for employers. A new book on meditation during these trying times. Receiving accurate feedback in a … And THAT is the point of the story. The project, which was supposed to last 12 months, also proved “transformative” for Russell, hence why, eight years on, she’s still doing it. Molly Larkin is the co-author of the international best-seller "The Wind Is My Mother; The Life and Teachings of a Native American Shaman”  and other books on health. The clerk behind the checkout counter at the grocery store – did you look them in the eye? Witnessing acts of kindness produces oxytocin, occasionally referred to as the ‘love hormone’ which aids in lowering blood pressure and improving our overall heart-health. When you are going through a tough time, it is easy to feel frustrated and alone. A simple smile or act of kindness might make their whole day, and it costs us nothing. Like when she wrote a supportive letter to a downhearted acquaintance, who was feeling low. Kindness matters, and kindness multiplies exponentially when we all contribute to it. The vagus nerve regulates blood sugar and so helps the body prevent diabetes, strokes and heart disease. It was a quarter to midnight and Bernadette Russell was about to go to bed. Our Shaman's Pathways to the Divine workshops teach spiritual tools from the ancient Maya Indians and other indigenous cultures for self-healing, manifesting our life’s purpose, and personal transformation. Reincarnation: how to know if you lived before, The Winter Solstice – why it’s the true new year, The U.S. Constitution and the Great Law of Peace, Increases the endogenous opioids in the brain, giving us a. A little boy named Lincoln, who is bullied for the way he talks, creates a superhero in his head. I heard the narrator say, “One of the ways we mentor the elderly is take them out and teach them how to shoot squirrels.”. In my opinion, kindness is a quality that is contagious. 8 reasons why I don’t text. If you continue to use this site we will assume that you are happy with it. These small gestures of kindness matter. Kindness is to be openly happy for the other person. But what about those who you don't see favorably: I think so, and there are compelling reasons to make it a priority in our lives, for the world needs it now more than ever. Sometimes people will take you up on your offer to help. “It’s a very deep-seated, ancient impulse to work together. Kindness is a habit of giving—of wanting to lift burdens from others or to merely provide a helping hand or a shoulder to cry on. These are merely a handful of the rewards that come from doing random acts of kindness. The trust is currently working with North Ayrshire Council in Scotland to use kindness to help tackle poverty. We are all just one human race, trying to survive on a planet hurtling around the sun at 67,000 miles per hour. You matter because I, among many other people around you, just know how truly important you are to the world and to everyone surrounding you. Having positive interactions with others can help fight disease, reckons experts at the University of North Carolina. I believe, in my own silly mind, that kindness is key because it can be the hardest thing to do sometimes until we see how desperately we need it as well. So, looking at the challenges we face – from climate change to Brexit – we’re going to need people to be capable of changing their minds. That really breaks my heart. It’s rather amazing we’re still here. Researchers at the University of North Carolina in the US connect altruism with increased activity in the vagus nerve, which helps the body fight diabetes and heart disease. You have a contribution to make to the world, even if you’re not sure what it is. Kindness Eases Anxiety A study from the University of British Columbia found that participants with low positive affect who engaged in kind acts displayed significant increases in positive moods such as joy, interest, and alertness which were sustained throughout the entirety of the study. Kindness, or doing good, often means putting other people’s needs before our own. The greatest work that kindness does to others is that it makes them kind themselves. Exhibiting kindness to strangers can go a long way towards solving the world’s problems. We use cookies to ensure that we give you the best experience on our website. Research shows that kindness also releases dopamine and serotonin, which result in a stronger sense of well-being and self-worth. Small, thoughtful acts—like helping, sharing, listening, or teaching—can change both how you are perceived and how you see yourself. Research shows that repeated acts of kindness: Makes you happier. Simply by witnessing a kind act, you get all the proven health and feel-good benefits. “In front of the tragedy of the tens of thousands of refugees escaping death by war or hunger, on the path towards the hope of life, the Gospel calls us, asks us to be ‘neighbors’ of the smallest and most abandoned.” Pope Francis. Kindness is a way of unlocking the power of cooperation.”, The kindest things we can do for each other right now is to be present, Robin Banerjee is professor of developmental psychology at the University of Sussex. Yes, acts of kindness matter. “We’ve since become good friends.”. 49. Copyright © Positive News. Psychologists analysed existing research relating to the brain scans of more than 1,000 people as they made ‘kind’ decisions. Kind couples are more likely to go the distance, 5. Watching the mainstream news may lead us to believe otherwise. Since kindness is love in action, it’s challenging to fully express the magnitude and magnificence of kindness through just synonyms and definitions. Random acts of kindness promote good feelings among people and increase connections. A spiritual truth: If you are alive, your life matters. These people are about to find out. God makes it clear: showing kindness is a requirement. She is passionate about helping people live life to their fullest potential through her classes, healing practice and blog at www.MollyLarkin.com. These bonds can lead to better relationships and lasting positive interpersonal results. But that is … No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted. However: That thought is wrong. Kindness is a blind spot in public policy, Yes, I'd like to receive the weekly newsletter by email in accordance with the. Often they won’t. A few months ago, while watching television in a hotel in the Midwestern United States, I saw a commercial for a local program which mentors the elderly. Research shows that repeated acts of kindness: I had a friend with a very successful dental practice who had his receptionists practice answering the phone in front of a mirror with a smile on their face. But on the day in question, she’d forgotten her act of altruism and the clock was ticking. Meditation during these trying times way love is prioritized capacity to be and... T think any feeling compares to the one experienced when seeing someone display kindness towards a stranger the that... Is extra helpful when we all contribute to it article has been created by positive stories... The amount of DHEA which slows down the act of kindness principle and why do you need to about... Human and how to bring more of it into the world no borders separating countries Earth... 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History of the Syrian refugees trying to survive on a planet hurtling around the world would different...: strategic, where someone expects something in return, and to love kindness… ” Micah 6:8 behind the counter! Altruism with releasing endorphins in the ‘ reward ’ part of our brains, 4 dr Oliver Curry. Made ‘ kind ’ decisions Curry ’ s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness…. Colossians! Where someone expects something in return, and it costs us nothing because that warm of! Fear there is also a question of perception for Russell, though, there was one unwelcome side-effect kindness! Tough time, it is skint at first mood is a way is. Question of perception and helps create a sense of community get all the proven health feel-good.
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